GOD DAMN IT. I have had to restart that other fucking computer 4 times in an hour this morning at least. MOTHERFUCKER. This is NOT helping the hostile feelings I have been having this morning.

Creepily enough, there was no Opium this morning, and there was only 1 e-mail from Vivian in my Apples account, and 1 stupid one in my Chickmail account. This is very odd. I feel abandoned. I half expect a Sergio Leone theme and tumbleweeds in the office about now.

I feel very irritated and hostile this morning, but a lot of you reading this know that my moods can change at the blink of an eye for little or no reason, so don't be scared. Everyone needs at least a few hours of being pissed off at life per week. And I need to get past the denial and avoidance to some extent every once in a while, since I do need to realize that I CANNOT RELATE TO ANY HUMAN BEING ON EARTH and NO ONE EVER KNOWS WHAT THE FUCK I AM EVER TALKING ABOUT.

O-kay! I don't really mean those things, but it's interesting to type them out. I bet everyone thinks I'm crazy now. What else is new? Diaries are for venting, anyway.

I've lately been infatuated with "Anitra's Dance" by Grieg, partially because I've always liked it, and it reminds me of "Ren and Stimpy." Also, I've noticed that, yes, there is a motherfucking cello in it. Ughhh. Damn it. I have probably created a mess for myself, since everyone probably thinks I am a cello-obsessed psychopathic freak. Go ahead, you know you do.