"it's funny to think that usually there is such a huge difference between how i feel and how i seem to portray myself. i always feel like people can see right through me but apparently i am so wrong." -venting.diaryland.com

I wish I had figured out/someone had told me that I don't need to express quite so much in my diary, oh, like four months ago. It seems really, really obvious now. It saddens me to think that so much of the distress I've caused in the past few months because of this damn diary could have been prevented if I had just shut up. Then there might not have been such a big difference in the way I can feel people acting towards me in the past few months.

So, I shall try to be happy and witty, because people should think that I am. People also think I am cynical:

cyn�i�cal (sn-kl)
adj.

Scornful of the motives, virtue, or integrity of others: a cynical distrust of friendly strangers; a cynical view of the average voter's intelligence.

Expressing or exhibiting scorn and bitter mockery: cynical laughter.

Um, no. I am so, so not that. I am unable to express myself without using some sarcasm and coming off a little bitter, is all. I am bitter right now, actually, but I guess I should suck it up. No important stuff in here. I feel like the kid in class who's been talking too loudly without realizing it, and the teacher had to tell me to be quiet, and now I'm embarrassed.

Wow, I really need to eat breakfast. I don't want to make us late.